Friday, April 06, 2007

Looking forward to Easter....

Bramwell has been crafting some lovely little Easter bonnets with tiny chicks and daffodils, they look a lot like bouquets for the dear departed Queen Mother or alternatively he makes little Wordsworths' out of peg dolls and pops little note books in their hands, which I think is very inventive. And ohh la la his own bonnet, a haze of shepherdesses and sheep, and a flowing stream, I don't know how he got it up there but there it is with a couple of paper boats. Moony wanted a spring flood on the river Nile so again lots of water. Charlie says he wont wear his as its "undignified" but I know Henny will talk him round because she thinks it is so "Bon Chic por vous!!!!". I have a little plan for the Easter egg hunt, why eggs? Why not lets say.... Brussels sprouts? So I spent quite a bit of time last night toughening up a couple fairly oval shaped Brussels and painting them with little chicks and bunnies. I have a feeling that my centres will be a surprise. I also decided that Sprouts made great apostles on the simmnel cake and made sure that each looked individual with a cheerful face and tried to make them robes but being round they just fell of so I iced them on. I think Moony was a bit sceptical, commenting that "If they had been like that they would have rolled away and stuck under chairs." I'm not put off. Lord Arbathnot is also organizing an Easter egg hunt but so far no takers which seems wise enough when one considers his history. Ivans been helping me find ingenious hiding places for my eggs and if were at a loose end we hide them under Moony who stays very still as long as there is gin and a pack of fags in the offing. Must go I think one of Charlie II lot is throwing Grannies eggs and flour about...... Goodbye for now................ "Monmouth that really will not do untie grandpa and clean those eggs of the policeman !!!!!!!!!!!"

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Mrs Nito here ..

a little explaination for our dear friend Marianne. You might think that our dear doctor Wittelsbach is a terrible old fraud .Sadly we have to tell you from our position in the village ( in the library) that it would appear that dear James did indeed like to wear Togas and Roman garb of all sorts. He became a penitant , walked on hot coals , whipped himself , starved himself etc . He was mocked by his brother for choosing ugly mistresses and was ultra delighted to have died on a day considered to be possibly the actual date Christ had been crucified. I think the poor Doc. has his work cut out. I suppose not too many of us go to war at the age of 8 , live in prison with daddy who is then executed ...thank-goodness Cutting Sprout has it's moments but nothing quite so awful . He is a dear boy really with a loving nature or we'd all avoid him !

Sunday, April 01, 2007

Zery interezting

Velcome into my zurgery, put your hat on ze coffee table (unlezz ze cause the terrible memoriez zor you) and zit down. I Dr M. Wittlesbach am von of Englanz leading psychoanalysts vich is not zaying much if you know ze British. Today however I find myzelf breaking Dr & Patient confidentiality. I know itz not my ztyle but I zpent much of ziz morning with a very damaged young man by ze name of Jamez. If he needed to talk to me zhen I need to talk to you zery much about him. James zuffers from a guilt complex zat whilst I understand its root puzzeled me, his main obzzessions zeem to be with ze zelf harming and vith ze togaz. All ze better if he can zelf harm vhilst vearing ze togaz. I didnt know vhat to zay zo I did aZ my professor taught me. I vent "Ahhh haaa Ummm Hummm ja, ja I zee." And "how did ziz impact on your relationzhipz" To vhich Jamez told me zat he was oddly drawn to ugly women, and showed me some pictures of his wifes and misstresses I could ze vat he meant I had never before zeen zuch vomen. Hiz first vife and I am not being petty veminded me of my goldfish at home vith whome I have a zery cloze and loveing relationzhip vhich I do not vish to talk about in front of company. I asked him if he thought such vomen ver a punishment for zoom zin vhich he had commited unvittingly. He began to cry about hiz father, a cause of much un-happiness amongst my patients I find and zezpected and Oedipus complex until he told me zat hiz father had been beheaded and he held himzelf rezponzible. I azked if ziz had been ze traffic accident and he replied zat it vas ze hairdresser Mr Cromwell whom he held responsible. I zondered vat kind of haircut it vas!! I never got to ze root of hiz problems I don't zhink anyvon could...