Monday, May 07, 2007

Charity begins at the sports wear shop...Part two

Moony trained as hard as she ever does (Sleeping in the wheelbarrow with a newspaper on her head) meanwhile I did what I did best baked some little round tartlets with running shoes iced on. One look and I'm sure the competitors would be spurred on. Finally the day dawned, amazingly clear Sky's the kind of weather the Reverend Pine-Coffin always enjoys heartily, by the time we got to the village green he and Mrs Pine-Coffin were sitting in a little tent with a thermos flask of tea and some rather moist little cucumber sandwiches . I huddled up with them and waited for everyone to arrive and line up. I was rather pleased to notice that everyone had entered into the spirit of the thing , even Mr Misery had donned a lovely new black tracksuit which he was proud to tell us all wasn't just black but "A new kind of black made from all the blackest things on earth. Coal, really dark raisins, tar, carbon black and oil. Cromwell would approve! " Cromwell who had come along stiffled a giggle as he went past in his orange and black strippy sequinned all in one. But I'm very polite so I just smiled and nodded. Harlot predictably was wearing less material than some of my flannels tighter than an elastic band, I was not impressed but suddenly Moony felt overdressed, she had finally convinced James to push her wheelbarrow which he saw as "Fun penance". Still at least they made good time unlike Harlot who spent her time leaning of fences chatting to Charlie II, she only returned to running if she saw Nell who had come as an orange "Its novel innit ! " Henny has much shorter legs than the rest of us so she was exempt from the running and kept to the village hall "I will mock sandwitches and tea in the big earn". I had decorated my little truck with Bramwells help, swags of purple roses and bows which looked rather delightful. Mrs Pine-Coffin would drive and Bramwell would play the piano whilst I sang and Ida told people their fortunes. The vicar fired his starting gun and we whipped round the green, past the President whose health prevented him from running but I noticed not from enjoying the sun and snacks outside the Full Moon & Lunatic, or the barmaids hospitality. I'm afraid even in our little village rivalry can ruin a pleasant sporting event and Mr Misery had to be disqualified after he tripped Charlie I up when he thought no one was looking. Oliver picked Charlie I up and helped him to the first aid stall where Henny fussed over him (she's so adorable) Oliver insisted on taking Charlie's running number and finishing the race for him. There was great surprise when a small red haired figure shot past, the President stood clapped and shouted "Come on Barbie" as this surprise entrant began to take the lead we were all very excited . Sadly we were enjoying ourselves so much that we didn't notice Mrs Bagshott-Smyth zip past in her little sports car but I saw her stop just short of the finish line and try to rush into first place. Of course we had words and she had to step aside as James came in first trundeling Mrs Moony. Charlie had started limping round the track with his cane and Henny to lean on. He came in last of course but we gave him a rossette. Oliver slapped him on the back and knocked him out cold. Moony graciously vacated her wheelbarrow into which he was dumped and we all made our way to the village hall for a little party. Eventually Charlie came round and joined in the celebrations. We'd made more than enough money to build the new radio transmitter. Radio Cutting Sprout is coming to a wireless near you very soon!


Marianne said...

Oh dear, I wrote out the longest comment and needed to go back and check something and lost it, dear me.

What a wonderful racing day you had! It was so very thrilling for me to read about...tsk tsk Mr. Misery, I'm quite relieved to hear Charlie I is alright though...nasty little spill though. Good going to James and Mrs. Moony! It all sounded so very colourful and grand, it did.
(will that Harlot never leave the village?)(a trouble maker that one).

I'll be waiting and ready to tune my radio in, how wonderful it will be to hear everyone's voices and am so looking forward to everyone's reports on their various expertise. Mrs. Nito, will you be making guest appearances? I was so hoping that you would have a programme of your own, perhaps about gardening? We all could learn from your green brussels sprout thumb, eh?

Holly Bernice Cox said...

Do you have a cat's whisker radio my dear? Our technology is a little behind the times !!!